A few little lessons I've learned recently--
People like to be asked & they like to be thanked.
Despite its name, the garbage disposal is not the place to dispose of garbage.
I have been using way too much laundry & dishwasher detergent for my appliances.
Wearing a proper-fitting bra causes people to ask me if I've lost weight. I haven't.
There is this dessert called "Crack Pie" because it is supposedly as addictive as crack cocaine. It is.
Children still play Bloody Mary, and Light as a Feather, Stiff as a Board at slumber parties!
On a related note, I have an old Ouija board in my upstairs closet that I suddenly feel an urge to part with...
We recently got upgraded to business class on a flight, and soon I realized what that old yarn means: "The luxury, once sampled, becomes necessity."
It is hard to find cute, non-clunky, affordable shoes for boys. That's why DS has several of the same pairs in multiple sizes & colors. And also why I love thrift stores.
It saves so much time to mix baby formula in a pitcher, then pour it into bottles. I'm a failed breast feeder, and I'm making peace with that.
DS just attended his first Easter egg hunt today. I didn't know that these days, most kids hunt for plastic eggs with goodies inside them. I brought real ones, hard-boiled & dyed with simple vinegar and food coloring. I swear I wasn't trying to be Martha fucking Stewart. Kids fought over them. Who knew? Must be their novelty.
Your comments, your tips, and/or your own life lessons are welcome!
8 comments:
Please post the recipe for "Crack Pie". Sounds like exactly what I need.
I LOVE business class. My husband always travels business class because he is 6'6 and has difficulty fitting in regulars seats. I usually fly economy but if we fly together, I insist on business class because there is NO WAY I am sitting in the back of the cattle car while he is riding up front.
Interested to know what you consider to be a "failed" breast feeder. I think these things are all relative. I breast fed DS for about 4 months exclusively, another 4 months introducing some formula, and at 8 months switched entirely to formula. I considered that a great success - maybe because I didn't have any expectations or determination about it one way or the other. I don't talk about it much though, because I don't want other peoples comments or mummy-competitiveness to discolor my feeling of success. I, too, mixed in jugs - only way to go.
Here's my life lesson - when trying to get pregnant and it's taking a really long time, try an ovulation kit. I was way WAY off on when I thought I was ovulating. One ovulation kit later and success!
@Jac - CONGRATS ON YOR PREGNANCY!!!!!!! Hooray!! I hope you feel great, and everything goes totally uneventfully, just as you've planned!
Here's a link to the Crack Pie recipe:
http://articles.latimes.com/2010/feb/11/food/la-fo-crackpierec11-2010feb11
It is a bit like the filling of a pecan pie, but without any pecans, and even more moist and gooey. It lives up to its name!
About "failed" breastfeeding - I had breast reduction surgery nearly 12 years ago. It was the right decision for my overall health, no doubt. But predictably, I had a low supply. My "failure" was that I didn't really pull out all the stops to produce as much milk as I could. Both my kids got formula supplementation within the first few days and with my DD, I quit entirely about 12 weeks postpartum.
In contrast, your story is a huge success! Exclusive for any amount of time is just awesome.
Dude, sorry I can't spell very gud!
We always made real eggs, too, and I was surprised to learn almost no one does it anymore for the hunt. They still sell the kits all over the place - are there underground dyed egg hunt clubs I'm not aware of?
I could really use some little life lessons about now. Mine all seem too big and I don't want to learn anymore.
Oh here's one: Driving a stick shift is really like riding a bike. Once you learn, you never forget no matter how long it has been.
@mom2boys, speaking of stick shift... Something really huge broke suddenly on my car last week and had to go into the shop for several days (remember, Podunk). So, I was pondering how to get myself and my kids around for 4 days and he said he would ordinarily offer to loan me his extra rice eater, but it's standard shift so it wouldn't work for me. I, at first offended, realized what he must see: a thirty something woman with 2 kids in a scandinavian car with my North Face jacket, who couldn't possibly know how to drive a standard vehicle.
By the way, you're right, it's been years but it came right back.
Also, my life lesson, which took me 35 years to figure out: leaving the dishes until the next morning will not make them go away and will be twice as difficult to deal with.
Congrats, Jac!
Hush, I wouldn't think of your story as a breastfeeding failure. More of a mommy-sanity saving win. Now, I breastfed Pumpkin for almost two full years, and plan to do the same for Petunia. But that is because I LIKED it, it worked reasonably well for me, and the pluses outweighed the minuses FOR ME, particularly since Pumpkin was sensitive to dairy, so any formula I used would have had to be the expensive, stinky stuff.
I always tell people to give breastfeeding 6 weeks. By that time you are probably over the initial pain and awkwardness. If it is still not working for you, then why add to your stress by trying to force the issue? It is not like formula is poison.
I just do not get this dogmatic attitude some people get.
Anyway, my life lesson- sleep makes me a better mother. So I suppose I should go get some.
@Jac - Congrats! That's so exciting! And great that the ovulation kit solved the problem!
I will have to check out the crack pie recipe because I do so love a good pie.
I think I've been using too much detergents also, because I read an article recently that was talking about that. I haven't looked into it further though.
Isn't it amazing what a correctly fitted bra will do for you body? IMO, it's always worth the money for one that makes you look thinner and the girls look perkier!
I was just bemoaning the difficulties of finding shoes for the boy that are cute and sturdy. I don't want a clunky, mini-man loafer or heavy sneakers! He's only 9 months old!
And I don't think the term "fail" should ever be used with feeding a baby, especially with breastfeeding. You tried, and it didn't work. I ditto @Cloud--it's not a failure, it's "a mommy-sanity saving win."
As for my own lesson learned, I've got three related ones:
1. If your head is super stuffy, just take the medicine. You'll feel better.
2. When learning to use a neti pot, don't try when you are too stuffy to breathe out your nose so that all the water gets into your ears.
3. If you feel pain in your ears while using a neti pot, STOP USING IT. And then work to drain BOTH ears before falling asleep. With water in them. And pain.
@mom2boy - I'm sad about your new name's singular form, and hope you are doing ok these days. "Ununderground dyed egg hunt clubs" - that's funny. It seems like kids hunt for plastic ones, but do real egg dying the day or two before Easter, and maybe the real eggs are hunted for or not.
@blue- You're right - cars here in our Podunkville do take several days to get fixed in the shop - what is up with that? No hustle at effing all! I have 2 cars that need body work and another really old one that leaked some shizz all over the garage and needs to be towed, but I can seem to find the energy to start the ball rolling.
@Cloud - "Mommy sanity-saving win," I hear ya. I hope you are getting some precious sleep!
@caramama - I recently found some boys shoes I like on that well-publicized site for shoes that rhymes with "crappos," but those mofos cost like $60+! I'm going with a much more affordable option from tarjay - they look a bit like "mini-man loafers" as you put it so well, but there was a sale so I bought them in size 8 and size 12. Then I teared up looking at how big DS's feet are soon going to get! My friend has had some luck finding cute toddler shoes on ebay... I own a neti pot but have been too chicken to give it a try.
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