Thursday, March 10, 2011

"PC Load Letter!!!???!!!"

Why can't we ever manage to find a basic, bare-bones inexpensive home printer that actually works? As in one that like actually prints documents and doesn't get an "out of paper" or "paper jam" message every 5 minutes? I don't need one that can fax or print photos. Scanner and basic printing capabilities will do.

Here's what I'd like to tell all the home printers I've purchased and hated before.

To our newest shitty printer purchase, the H-Pee AWFUL-ice-jet 4500, I say: Go eff yourself! Unfortunately, we have to live with your broke ass a little longer.

To its shitty predecessor, El Ep-Sun Style-less See-Ex 4450, I say: We had you for like a month because you were included for free with some other equipment we got. (The fact we paid nothing for you should have been our first clue.) Eff you very much!

To the O.G. printer we got back in like 2004, the H-Pee All in one 6210: Thank you for some shits and giggles. We got to talk to some guys in India about your issues on two occasions. Eff off!

Tomorrow I take 2 useless printers to the recycling place; the other I must keep until a better replacement can be found at a reasonable price point. Oy.

The good news is DH and I have date night tomorrow, and we get to see an actual movie in the theater. Maybe it will be at the same theater where I went into labor with DD 17+ months ago while watching "Zombieland." Good times!


Parisienne Mais Presque said...

HA! You know, I really can't laugh right now because Mademoiselle is asleep on my lap and I would have held you personally responsible for waking her up.

I love this post. And the "Office Space" reference. Good luck with the printer. If you take it out to an empty lot to whack it apart with a baseball bat, do take pictures...

blue said...

LOL! Printers are like needles in my eyes.

You know we had an old TV that we felt this way about too. My husband took it outside and shot it with a shot gun just for fun. One of the perks of living in the middle of Po-Middle-of-Freakin-Nowhere-Dunk. I'm not a hick and I'm really not into guns, but that was pretty satisfying to see.

Cloud said...

We finally broke down and bought a color laser printer, because the ink jet ones kept clogging up- we don't print in color often enough, apparently.

I know someone who threw her laptop off her balcony. It was a company laptop. I never did hear how she explained that to her IT department....

Melba said...

10 years ago we bought the cheapest ink jet colour printer we could find. It's a Can't-On i550. And although I may complain about how expensive the cartriges are and how ridiculously fast they're out of ink, the stupid thing is still running just fine. It is noisy and rattles and shakes the whole table it sits on, and it takes like 3 freaking' minutes per page but it still works and has never jammed or broken or anything. The thing won't die. And we do so little printing that we can't really justify replacing it. So there you go.