Tuesday, August 31, 2010

"The Toys Are Going Back To The Store!!"

I hate when life and Actual Work get in the way of blogging. Sorry for the recent absence here & at other bloggy friends' places. I'm brain dead today. I was up more times last night than I can count - I had a nagging cough that no medicine could address, plus both kids woke me up multiple times... and DH eventually told DS to "SHUT UP!!!" (And he honestly wonders where DS learns those kinds of phrases! "I learned it from you, dad! I learned it by watching you!!" Remember those lame anti-drug ads of the 80s anyone?) But I have to say, this is where the work we've been doing in marriage counseling has started to pay off. We didn't fight at 4am. We mentioned it calmly this morning and agreed to discuss it later and come up with a plan. I hardly recognized us! We actually sounded functional. I need DH to stop yelling "The Toys Are Going Back To The Store!!" whenever DS misbehaves. He needs me to stop letting DH be the bad guy all the time. We'll get there.

So all I've got are some random thoughts I feel the need to share.

The last 3 times I've heard an interesting, catchy tune on the radio lately that's made me sit up and take notice, and jot down the lyrics so I could google to find out what band it is - it has turned out to be a song by The Killers. ("Smile Like You Mean It," "Read My Mind," & "When You Were Young.) Yeah, I know they've been out for awhile. It's that rock I've been living under. I should probably just go ahead and download all of their albums. You know, this is making me feel old, not knowing what the kids are listening to anymore.

I just found out that "Weeds" is not over yet! Last year I swear I heard a rumor that it was their final season, now they're baaackk. I don't get Showtime though, so we'll probably Netflix it next summer. I have a friend who thinks I look exactly like Mary-Louise Parker (only about 60 lbs heavier and with ginormous boobies.) I think she's wrong. I've also been told I look exactly like Mariah Carey - and those ladies don't look alike at all.

DS is now 34 months and is finally daytime potty trained - um, that is, only when we keep him completely naked on the bottom. As in, he doesn't need any reminders (any parental reminders just piss him off) - he puts his skinny little butt right on the big potty whenever nature calls, and even remembers to flush. BUT the minute we put cloth underwear or a pullup on him, he treats it like a diaper. We hope someday soon it will click in his brain that he can pull pants down, but for the last month we have had a half naked toddler running around and it has really eased the load (pun intended.. gross right).

Only one episode of True Blood left! What the fuck am I going to do with myself? ;)

I really really hate working out, but I got pudgy enough that I looked in the mirror and stepped on the scale and was like "I need to get my lard ass to the gym!" I really don't hate my body, believe it or not, I have lovely curves (or so DH lies to me) it is just that my thighs were rubbing together and that needed to stop. There is this crazy ass gym around here that does really odd but cool exercises where you basically lift and pull heavy shit using this proper form the owners teach you. The workouts are only 25 minutes but you either want to pass out or puke after each one. Good times. After 5 sessions, my thighs stopped rubbing together and I'm getting those "have you lost weight?" comments that can sound totally backhanded if not said with the right tone.

DD turns 11 months at the end of this week, and I am sad thinking of how her infancy went by in a heartbeat. I'm also thinking some odd negative/regretful thoughts about choices we've had to make to survive this last almost-year. How I don't have the energy to dress her as cute as I did her brother at her age; how her room is still not decorated!! How the dream doesn't always match the reality. But it's ok. The things that truly mattered are taken care of.

What have you got?


MrsHaley said...

The dream does not match the reality. No it does not. Sing it.

nej said...

Oh, I love Mary-Louise Parker. But I hate Mariah Carey. Although I do have to admit that she's beautiful. Good for you that you've got the magic to look like two remarkably different but both very beautiful women!

A more functional marriage! Thighs that respect each other's space! I know you've worked really hard and I'm so happy that the payoff is already apparent. How encouraging.

Maria said...

Right?? Thighs that rub together suck! I started got them a year and a half ago and resorted to wearing yoga pants or capri leggings all summer when it was a billion degrees to prevent thigh-chafe. Icky ickster.

My plan is that the puppy will walk it off for me.

Jac said...

I just wanted to ditto you all the way through this post.

I actually think "the toys are going back to the store" is pretty funny because it's so ridiculous (and exactly the kind of empty threat kids will quickly learn is not enforced). It's probably also funny because I've only heard it once. DH has a couple of those useless counter-productive phrases too, that he likes to toss around in the heat of a moment.

Love The Killers.

We potty-trained using the bottom naked method too :) I'm partially convinced that DS just loves flashing his penis around so much, that the bottom naked method was it's own reward system for him.

Had the exact same thought about True Blood - bitched about it to DH (because summertime tv is so god-awful - really, am I the only person who hates reality television?) and he downloaded the first couple seasons of Dexter and Mad Men for me to try. Gotta say, I am loving Dexter. There's no hunk o' burning Eric, but still good.

My thighs are totally chafing right now. I am giving myself a free pass until I am done breastfeeding next baby and then.... no more excuses! (snort). Meanwhile, am just going to finish off this ice cream sandwich bar if you'll excuse me...

blue said...

Welcome back!

Yay on the potty training. Hope it continues to be successful--it will work eventually, just keep plugging away at his pace. He isn't going to be naked from the waist down in college. OK, maybe he will, but it won't be because of potty training issues. :)

It's funny. If anyone is more prone to the empty threats around here, it's me. Once in a while I hear myself saying something totally retarded to my child and I can't believe it's coming out of my mouth. It's like I've been programmed by some mid-50's TV show. "If you don't wear those shoes, I'm throwing them in the trash!"

I've never seen Weeds or True Blood, but in the heyday of my TV watching, DH and I were big Buffy and Angel fans. Does that score me any Hush points?

I am feeling you on the working out thing. I don't even want to talk about thighs. Sadly, I have always been "pear" shaped, but with a second child that came without losing all of the baby weight from #1, it's gotten more out of hand. I've always struggled with my weight. I bob from just plain fat to a healthy athletic look (still bigger than most people, but skinny for me). Right now I'm in between. Started jogging a couple of months ago. That plus WW seems to be doing something.

I like the sound of your wild wild west work outs. I don't know why, but your description conjured a strange image for me of a bunch of podunk cowboys hanging out in a bar, Roadhouse style, lifting chairs, bucking broncos and just generally fucking shit up. Yes, I'm stupid like that. You like.

Anything that makes you want to puke after 25 minutes is going to make you feel great for the rest of the day. Go with it, girl.

Cloud said...

Hmmm. I've got an 11 month old baby, too, and can't quite believe that.

And an almost 3.5 year old who, when asked/told she should go sit on the potty says "the pee is having his dinner right now and doesn't want to come out." Really, how do you reply to that? I've just totally given up. She clearly CAN control her pottying, since she doesn't have many accidents at day care and almost never has a poop accident. She just doesn't want to, and nothing I've tried has changed her mind. So we're going to stop trying and embrace the laundry and/or pull ups, depending on how her fancy takes her.

She would freak out if I tried to get her to run around without pants on. She does that very rarely, and generally wants her pants on right away!

I'm not going to talk about the state of my thighs, because it depresses me. Like @Jac, I'm giving myself a pass until I stop breastfeeding, or actually until I stop pumping. That will free up some time.

I'm not a TV watching person, so I can't commiserate there....

Jac said...

@ Cloud, our DS's little best friend HATES being naked. We call him the Never-Nude :) Kid's personalities are so funny. I once asked DS what he wanted to do that day, and he told me "be naked". He LOVES being naked.

mom2boy said...

If you like The Killers try Kings of Leon. I also love One Republic but they are more Coldplay (What If being my favorite CP song right now) than The Killers. Animal by Neon Trees is a fun song currently out. :)

I started a full load of classes last week so my miniscule amount of tv watching is down to nearly non-existent but I watched the first season of Weeds many moons ago and I adore MLP. She's writes a guest column for Esquire I think. She's way cool. My celebrity look alike is Jennifer Aniston. I'd prefer MLP or Anne Hathaway but no such luck.

Co-parenting with someone who sees black when you see white is really, really hard, yo. I'm going to be better for it I hope.

Over the summer break I was going to yoga a couple times a week. Now neither my schedule nor my budget permits it sooooo must come up with an alternative because not eating isn't a sustainable plan. Awesome that you've found a gym you like!!

It is okay that her outfits aren't as cute or her room isn't catalogue ready. Her parents are working hard at being the best people and parents they can be - a way better gift than a matching crib set and mural.

mom2boy said...

@ cloud "pee is having his dinner and doesn't want to come out" too funny! well, to read probably not to hear under the circumstances. best of luck getting past this issue quickly!

hush said...

@MrsHaley - Word!! (That's me singing it).

@nej - I've also been told I have a "generic face," and have been mistaken for people many times, and often told I look like random people someone knows. I remember going to Disneyland at about age 8 and this woman came up behind me and started talking to me as if I was her daughter. I turned around and she was mortified to realize I wasn't her kid. How odd!

@Maria - Yeah thigh chafe is downright painful. My dad lost 25 lbs from walking his dogs, so I know it can happen.

@Jac - "Dexter" is one we want to eventually watch. I listened to the audio book the show is based on during a road trip 3 years ago and it stuck with me. "Breaking Bad" is also on the list. And you know am I buttcrazy for "Mad Men"! Did you ever watch "The Wire"? Loved it.

@blue - "It's like I've been programmed by some mid-50's TV show" ha ha!! We all have. It is amazing the shit we are all carrying around in our subconscious minds. 'Buffy' & 'Angel' definitely score hush points* redeemable for mad props at your local Tarjay. Yeah I still shop there despite the recent brouhaha because if you think about it every corp who supports any Republican (and most Dems like Mr. anti-gay marriage himself Pres. Obama) is in fact homophobic! And I gots to shop somewhere, people! That wasn't directed at you, blue. You're my boy, blue!

@Cloud - ""the pee is having his dinner right now and doesn't want to come out." Please put that on a t-shirt!! My god, your girl is so clever! This is one of those things that will seem more cute than aggravating someday, if not already.

@mom2boy - Thanks for the band recs. I've heard One Republic - now that boy can really sing! I will check out "What If" - my current CP fave is "The Scientist." "A way better gift than a matching crib set and mural" - you are so right, and that was really well-put.

Melba said...

Commenting late, just got back from vacation. Which was awesome. Will blog it later. Just a few comments though:

Ditto on the thigh chaffing. Just last night I was laying in bed, thinking "gawd I have to do something about this". Annie's 7.5 months... no excuses anymore really. Gotta get my butt to the gym so I can puke after 25 mins. Yay.

And Rosie was a bare-butt potty trainer too. But she's a girl, so I could put her in dresses so I didn't have to look at her bare ass all day long. So there's a little piece of sunshine to look forward to with your DD - put her in cute dresses while she's potty training and you'll kill two birds with one stone. Dressing cute and going commando all at the same time. Glorious!

caramama said...

"I learned it from you, dad! I learned it by watching you!!" We use that line all the time, just not in front of the kids. It makes us laugh. Very awesome that the therapy is really paying off. Keep up the good work!

The Killers totally rock! I need to get their albums too.

Good luck with the potty training. I love that he's just running around nekkid from the bottom down! hehe.

Let go of the regrets! You did what you had to do to get through, and you are almost through the first year! If it makes you feel any better, I still haven't put up any of the cute things for the walls of the nursery. That would be the room that my daughter used before my son, so we've not put that stuff up for 3.5 years now. I think about it all the time, but I still haven't put anything up.

As for me, I've got a whole lot of things I don't seem to have time to write about, and a whole lot of solo parenting lately, including this upcoming weekend. It's good, but tough.

@Jac - "that the bottom naked method was it's own reward system for him." HA! I also hate reality TV. I've got some good suggestions for TV shows to make it year round. I'll have to post about that sometime.

@blue and @Cloud - "but it won't be because of potty training issues." "the pee is having his dinner right now and doesn't want to come out." You guys are making me laugh!